would like some more answers (getting good ones so far) is this a warning sign? of should i stick it out?
been with bf on and off for almost 3 years (last 2 years solid-no breakups). we’ve had our issues due to me having PMDD (caused alot of our fights-now takes meds and see a counselor) and him being too used to being a bachelor. i’m 28 w/3 girls part-time that he loves very much and he’s 29 never been married or lived w/a gf.
we’ve been seeing a counselor for a couple of weeks now to help sort out the little hangups that are causing our arguments. he was totally agreeable to going. but in the sessions, he seems scared of having a "timeline" of me and the kids moving in w/him being put on him. the counselor asked him what he thought should happen if we didnt fight anymore-his anwers were to have the kids spend more time at his house during the day and eventually all of us spending the night there. but he stated that just b/c we were all spending the night didn’t mean we were going to move in right away.
little more below..
he told the counselor that he wanted to make sure we were all on the same page before moving in together and getting married. i do agree with him and think his heart is in the right place and i truly think the reason it’s moving so slow is b/c the arguments are setting us back (which he said they were) but a small part of me worries that he’s afraid to commit. what should i think?!!
he does help me get the kids from school each week and tells them he loves them all the time. we are carving pumpkins and going trick or treating with the kids tomorrow so he spends lots of time with them. i see him about every other weekend alone w/no kids. most of my stuff is at his house and i’ve had a key now for about 2 years….
Sounds like a bit of fear of commitment mixed with more fear of what has happened with you in the past. He’s sticking it out with you and your kids, but is not sure about the future.
Sounds like a bit of fear of commitment mixed with more fear of what has happened with you in the past. He’s sticking it out with you and your kids, but is not sure about the future.
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Sounds like you need to get your head together before you make any more major decisions. Relax a bit keep the counseling going.
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What is his past? Does he come from a similar situation as one that moving forward would potentially lead to?
He may be concerned about you and your kids and not want to create instability in their impressionable age.
You won’t know until you figure out a way to get him to talk. It may be that he just doesn’t know, and doesn’t know how to figure it out.
Ok… I’m an optimist… =)
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this guy is serious about u.
he really is, to agree to counseling, & the way he is w/ur kids.
he sounds like a great guy.
i say stick it out, work on minimizing the fights.
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