How do I go back to enjoying life after getting out of an abusive relationship that has drained me?
My ex seems to have no problem moving on with his life…I am stuck at home raising our kids without any help from him at all. I try to do things with my kids because they are my primary focus but I feel as if my life is just passing me by. My self esteem and self confidence seems to have drifted away, if it wasn’t for my beautiful kids showering me with their love I would be a total wreck.
Trust me, you w/get over it & get back to a better than before kind of life. Of course your ex has no problem moving on, because he was the problem to you, but of course not to himself. So he’s going to remain the same regardless. You on the other hand now have the sole responsibility of everything on your shoulders. Once things get settled down & as back to normal as you can get them, you WILL start to feel better about yourself. Rite now you feel like you’re at the bottom of the barrel. But slowly but surely you w/climb out of that barrel & you will be OK again. Let things start to settle down & get use to at least not having the abusive person in your life. Look forward each day to at least knowing it’s not going to end up in a fight at any point of your day. You can at least be thankful for that & know your day is going to be normal. Be thankful you have your children who love their mom & who bring sunshine & happiness in your daily life. No more doom & gloom. Just take things as they come the best way you can. That’s all that’s expected of you. Just doing the best you can for that one day at a time. Some days may be brighter than others, but there’s always tomorrow. No one said you have to be perfect by any means or that you have to do things perfectly. Just the best you can for that one day. Try to have an attitude of gratitude in that you at least have a chance of somewhat a normal day now. I know how much an abusive relationship can do to you, I too lived in one, both mentally & physically. I DO know the stress & what it does to one’s nerves. But w/o that abrasive person in your life, there’s no where you can go but up. All of a sudden you’ll notice you can finally relax & have no more fears. That alone w/change your life on it’s on in time. Be happy you have your kids who can bring you joy & smiles on your face. I KNOW for a fact you’re going to feel better. You’ll start to feel good about yourself as you look back & see all you’ve been able to overcome. And you will. I’ve walked in your shoes & know the road w/start to get less bumpy & you’ll finally be walking on level ground again. I did it, I KNOW you w/too. You w/find happiness again. You don’t know what’s around the corner waiting for you. I can promise you things WILL get better for you just like they did for me. Be good to yourself, you deserve it. I DO wish you all the best & happiness in your future…:)
Time
Sure it’s easier for him to move on, his only responsibility is to put a check in the mail once a month. Men are not so emotionally attached usually, and most men don’t leave a relationship till they have something else lined up.
Be proud of yourself that you got out of an abusive relationship, many women never find the strength to do that. You are being a wonderful mom to your kids, is there really anything more important than that? Let these reasons boost your self-esteem and self confidence.
As time goes on, you will become your old self again, you will be able to find more in your life to be happy about, it just takes some time. In time you will realize that you not only survived an abusive relationship but you had what it takes to do right by your children, and that is a huge accomplishment right there.
One thing that helped me a lot when I was feeling down on myself was to take a class at a junior college. It reminded me how intelligent, outgoing, and helpful I was. I really felt terrific when I got that A.
Most of all be kind to yourself, treat yourself how you would treat your best friend if she was in the position you are in.
Best wishes
References :
Trust me, you w/get over it & get back to a better than before kind of life. Of course your ex has no problem moving on, because he was the problem to you, but of course not to himself. So he’s going to remain the same regardless. You on the other hand now have the sole responsibility of everything on your shoulders. Once things get settled down & as back to normal as you can get them, you WILL start to feel better about yourself. Rite now you feel like you’re at the bottom of the barrel. But slowly but surely you w/climb out of that barrel & you will be OK again. Let things start to settle down & get use to at least not having the abusive person in your life. Look forward each day to at least knowing it’s not going to end up in a fight at any point of your day. You can at least be thankful for that & know your day is going to be normal. Be thankful you have your children who love their mom & who bring sunshine & happiness in your daily life. No more doom & gloom. Just take things as they come the best way you can. That’s all that’s expected of you. Just doing the best you can for that one day at a time. Some days may be brighter than others, but there’s always tomorrow. No one said you have to be perfect by any means or that you have to do things perfectly. Just the best you can for that one day. Try to have an attitude of gratitude in that you at least have a chance of somewhat a normal day now. I know how much an abusive relationship can do to you, I too lived in one, both mentally & physically. I DO know the stress & what it does to one’s nerves. But w/o that abrasive person in your life, there’s no where you can go but up. All of a sudden you’ll notice you can finally relax & have no more fears. That alone w/change your life on it’s on in time. Be happy you have your kids who can bring you joy & smiles on your face. I KNOW for a fact you’re going to feel better. You’ll start to feel good about yourself as you look back & see all you’ve been able to overcome. And you will. I’ve walked in your shoes & know the road w/start to get less bumpy & you’ll finally be walking on level ground again. I did it, I KNOW you w/too. You w/find happiness again. You don’t know what’s around the corner waiting for you. I can promise you things WILL get better for you just like they did for me. Be good to yourself, you deserve it. I DO wish you all the best & happiness in your future…:)
References :
My life’s experiences…
Just remember you didn’t get here overnight, you aren’t going to heal overnight.
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