Stop the Pain of Break Up NOW Before It's Too Late!

i really like a guy, but he has a girlfriend. they are probably going to breakup, but until then, if it even happens, does anyone have any way to not feel like killing someone or crying every time i see them together? Please help!
Wow….i’m getting so many mixed answers! just, so you know….i’m not too imature for a relationship, i can’t control my emotions. also, i was joking when i said i wanted to kill someone. i DO NOT need professional conseling. to everyone who actually understands~ thanks!
oh, and don’t worry, i would never intentionally break them up!
Why the hell is everyone saying i need professional help? why does liking someone require professional help????!

Voodoo…

Works like a charm.

Technorati Tags: ease, pain

We broke up 4 days ago under mutual agreement. Ever since then the pain was so unbearable and I find it hard to breath. I talked to my ex saying I want to see him, he agreed. Now we still see each other everyday, actually I still live in his house everyday for the past 2 days. But we are together only as friends. Before we lived together, so now when I can’t see him, I feel absolutely painful to the extent I can’t stand it. But when I live in his house and think we are no longer bf/gf, I still feel very painful although less. I don’t know how to ease the pain. Should I just be strong and cut all the ties or should I still be friends with him to make the breakup easier, but i don’t know if it can help or make it harder for me.

I’ve been in a similar situation, and trust me, the more time you spend together now, the more it will hurt and make it harder for you to recover. You need to definitely cut ties for now, and then maybe in a few months time make contact again and see how it goes. I cut ties with my ex and now it’s been much easier to move on and be happy again. Time heals all wounds.

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RIGHT NOW! What can I do to ease the pain of a horrible breakup. I am completelty devastated and i cant eat or sleep. I am at work now but I keep my eyes keep tearing up. What can I do RIGHT NOW to ease the pain even if it only eases it for a couple of minutes. Please have compassion for me. I am so suffering right now. I hurts so much because I love him soooo much!

U POOR GIRL LOVE I NO HOW U FEEL, BUT U NEED TO SPEND TIME WITH UR GIRLFRIEND AND HAVE GIRL FRIEND QUALITY TIME THERE IS NOTHING BETTER THAN SPENDING TIME WITH GF, DON’T WATCH ROMANTIC MOVIES CAUSE THAT MAKE U FEEL SADER. KEEP BUSY. RING UR GF AND MAKE PLANS BUT WHEN U R OUT WITH UR GF U MEANT2 HAVE A GOOD TIME SO DON’T TALK ABOUT UR EX A LOT. ITS GOOD TO TALK ABOUT IT TO GET IT OFF UR CHEST BUT DO IT AT THE BEGAINNING OF THE OUTING FOR THE REST OF IT ENJOY IT WITH YOUR GF HAVING SOME GIRLY FUN. THINGS WILL GET BETTER, YOU MIGHT NOT THINK IT WOULD RITE NOW BUT TRUST ME IT WILL. TIME HEALS ALL WOUNDS. I NO AS I HAVE BEEN THERE. IF U WANT 2 GET BACK WITH UR BF I THINK U SHOULD WAIT 4 SEVERAL WEEKS AND HAVE FUN WITH UR GF FOR NOW AND C HOW THINGS GO AND C HOW U FEEL, U MIGHT FIND THAT AFTER SPENDING TIME AWAY AND SPENDING TIME WITH UR GF U MIGHT NOT WANT HIM BACK, OR HE MIGHT WANT U BACK CAUSE HE MISS U A LOT. BUT DON’T HOLD ON TO THAT THOUGHT. OK. BUT ENJOY THIS TIME WITH THE GIRLS

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I was in a 13-month interracial relationship. It was not easy for both of us:

- he cannot be committed to me without his family rejection over a interracial marriage
- he cannot express his feeling because english is not his first language
- he cannot be himself becuase he cannot speak hindi with me
- his mom kept pushing him for marriage, but he can’t tell his mom about me
- I feel seperated/lonely whenever i hang out with his friends.
- I feel insecure about the whole situation from the beginning to the end – worried when he is going to get arranged with another girl in his culture
- I feel i cannot connect with him and there is a gap between us.
- I feel desperate…i want light in the relationship, but it is always dark
- We like each other, we enjoy each other’s companies, we talk to each other in numerous hours of phone calls everyday

Despite all these, we managed to be together for 1 year. We were, in general, very happy together, but wenever we both talk about/think of the future. We ended up talking about breaking up. So, this time is finally 99.99%.

He decided to break up with me because his friend has a similar issue like ours. She chose to marry the man despite of the family’s disappoval. The family is now no longer calling her their daughter!

This is like a series of scences in a drama:

1. He was very strong-willed. He told me strongly, "I don’t like you, that’s it. I cannot do this anymore. Even now i feel intensed to be in a relationship with you, it will be 100x more intensed after i told my parents about you."

2. He still called me for the next two days and told me how much he missed calling me sweety..So i asked what does he want, he responded the same way as before.

3. I msged him and snapped ties with him. He regret for saying no to me cus I "may be the best thing he will ever have".

4. The next day, I called him and decided to ask him what’s his intention for saying that. He said "he doesn’t know what he is doing." but he still insisted of snapping ties, so i agreed.

He is going back to his native land to visit his parents in 2 weeks. I don’t know whether i should hope for anything at this point. I am so worried he is going to find another girl during his visit. I have so much stress in myself and i feel very sad. I feel hopeless and have thought of hurting myself to ease my pain from my heart.

REMEMBER THIS QUOTE:

"If you love something let it go. If it comes back it’s yours. If it doesn’t it was never meant to be." -Unknown

If he really had it in heart to be with you, then that’s all that would matter to him. I don’t think there is anything you can do but move on with your life. Why get into a marriage where the in-laws will not accept you anyway? That’s rough.

So consider this a favor to you. You can be with someone more valuable and more loving. Someone with a better family upbringing.

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I just got out of a serious 5-year relationship. I broke up with him, but there was no big incident or drama that led to it. He’s a good guy, and I still love him, but he’s just not the right guy for me.

Anyway, after 5 years, I’m used to talking to him every day, and sharing everything with him. Without that now, I’m feeling lonely and I miss him very much and can’t stop thinking about him. I know that breakups are painful and I’m not looking for a way to avoid that; I just want to know what I’m supposed to do to help me cope. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Sorry to hear about the break up
I’ve been through similar and to be honest the best things for me were definitely keeping myself as busy as possible, doing things that you can do on your own without thinking of him automatically, doing things you enjoyed before you were with him as well.
You’ll probably have good days and bad days and you know it won’t be easy but the idea is to make it as easy for yourself as possible.
Watching stand ups etc of my favourite comedians is always a nice distraction, cooking, sleeping, TV, computer games, going out and seeing friends (very important!), curling up with a good book, a nice bath… just things that make you smile regardless of who is in your life.
I hope this helps at least a little bit. Feel free to message me if you’re struggling or anything x

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I am devastated and can’t eat and sleep. I was kicked out of where I lived with my boyfriends of 2 years because he says he needs freedom. How do you ease the pain? Even just temporarily? Every moment I think of him. EVERY song, place, words, tv shows remind me of him and it is literally pure torture. I can’t stop crying, even now I can’t hardly see the keyboard while I am typing. Please anyone or God, help me. I never have been in such misery…. Please advise of anything I can do right NOW to ease it. Even if it only last a minute… Bless you all for helping me. I am so in love with him…

Pray. Talk to God out loud if you feel like it. Talk to Him as if you were talking to your best friend, or parent. Tell Him everyhting you feel, and put your trust in Him to ease your pain. Remember you’re NOT alone.

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3 year relationship. 1st relationship ive had. the reason we are breaking up is i just don’t see myself with her long term and i want to move on.

I can only speak for myself, but it took me about a year to get over my 5 year relationship. It was also my 1st relationship. We broke up on different terms though. We had trust issues. But if you don’t see yourself with that person long term, you are doing the right thing. It’s not fair to you and it’s not fair to your partner. The best advice I can say is to allow yourself to feel the hurt. It’s when you try to avoid it that it makes it worse. I remember when I was in this position and I cried a lot, but I also went out with my friends a lot too. It’s what I needed to do for me. Good Luck!

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I have recently gone through an exponentially painful breakup. Not to sound depressing but I will explain. The way I feel is that I have been stripped of all security and hope. I know it’s sounding a little slit your wrists but I’ll continue. This person and I are having a child together. We’re both young. We started off amazing and thought we were better than everyone else. That was when we were in a high school state of mind. We’ve been so completely and utterly attached. We were on fire. Then reality came crashing down on us when we found out I was pregnant. Things starting spiraling downward rapidly. He got into drugs. He’s been stealing money, lying, manipulating, and who knows what else. I, however, have been struggling increasingly to be a better person; to better myself for my coming child. He’s treating me worse than the dirt he steps on, never getting physically violent with me, but through all the suffering I’ve been put through due to him, I still love him more than you could know. I get so frustrated trying to get him to realize what he’s doing and who he’s hurting. He consistently ignores my cries and goes about his days. I am emotionally dying,and because of the stress I am physically defeated as well. I love him. I’ll always love him. I am probably the last person that cares about him, yet he’s pushing me away. I am so deeply troubled and have lost my will to find an answer; a cure of any kind to relieve me of this heartache. We recently had a fight that could have been World War 4,5,and 6. He said he has made his decision that he wants nothing to do with me or our child, but I can’t help but listening to that screaming thought in the back of my mind telling me he does not mean that. I don’t believe it. I don’t believe it. I don’t believe he believes it. I need advice. Remedies. Anything that will stop me from having him resting in my thoughts. Preferably music. Any music. any suggestions. Music seems to be therapy for me at the moment. If you are reading this entire entry, I thank you for being interested enough to help me.

That’s a really hard position to be in. I used to be a drug addict myself before I became clean. I was a freshman in college at the time and it took a lot for me to fix myself. I too was pushing people away, people that were in the position you are in now. In reality, the only one that can fix this problem is him. He needs to see that you love him, but you also aren’t going to tolerate it. If he says he wants nothing to do with you or the child, honor it; He needs to experience what alone really means. He’s got it in his mind that no matter what he does, you’ll always be there; you need to show him that this isn’t true. Though you may love him, nothing can help the situation or your broken heart until you help yourself. You need to be strong woman for yourself. Don’t do it just for him or for you either; do it for your unborn child as well.

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i’ve been with her for 11 years ,married almost 2 with 2 wonderful children.its been 6 weeks now we have been apart, i step out of the house to give her space, she wont divorce me , she doesnt want my clothing out of the house . when i call to ask what went wrong , she chews my head off. then 2 days later she’ll be calm . she’ll say dont picture her in my future, but than she’ll say give me time and it all would come in to place. i really dont want to move forward and i dont want to move backwards. im stuck. and the ball is in her court.should i wait for her, should i give her time , should i move on with my life .i know she just cant forget 11 years of being together.i mess up once about 5 years ago ,we got married to start a clean slate. i guess it was never clean , im not a perfect human being , opinions please cause im lost .

No, the ball is in YOUR court. You have to decide to forge on with her or go it alone, but YOU make the decision

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I was married for 10 years and when I found out I was being cheated on, I left her. Prayer was the only thing that got me through. I’d sit there and have long prayers, pouring my heart out. Talking about it made me feel better and things started to go better after that. For that, I thank God.
It will take time though, a lot of time. Good luck.

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