Stop the Pain of Break Up NOW Before It's Too Late!

My BF of 4 months disappeared twice in the past 3 wks while on a business trip to launch a very stressful work project. Before that we talked daily, went out every weekend. (No sex yet.) The day he left he was very distant & disengaged, & called me for the 1st time only 8 days later, only after I sent him a note asking what’s up. He apologized profusely, said it would never happen again, asked if we could still date. I accepted his apology said I understood. But not sure about dating (I mean, how much time/effort does it take to send someone a quick text?). We talked a couple of times the following week; we were friendly but things just weren’t the same. We were supposed to meet for a 3-day getaway at the end of his trip, but I asked for a rain check. Just wasn’t feeling comfortable about it. That was 6 days ago. He seemed to understand. Haven’t heard from him since. Have I been dumped by silence? If not, is this even a relationship I should stay in? How do I get to the bottom of it?

you made him think that you were no longer interested, and he probably accepts the fact that he "blew it"

but if you still want him you should really get on that, because I thinks its more your fault

Technorati Tags: closure, disappearance, Dumped, move

I was dating a woman that I was madly in love with and when we broke up she did some really horrible things to me. Without getting into specifics, I still have deep feelings for her but she wants absolutely nothing to do with me anymore. I am crushed. I had some flowers and gifts delivered to her home for her birthday and she told her doorman to refuse the package. The following week she had an attorney write a bogus cease and desist letter. Trust me, I am not a stalker. I do not harass people and have never acted violently towards anyone ever. I moved across the country to be closer to this woman and she broke my heart. Do I move on and leave this city? How do I get the kind of closure that I need to be at peace with something that still continues to hurt me deeply?

Move on and grow.

Technorati Tags: closure, move

I really thought this guy liked me…he was sending all the signals, but never asked me out. He sent me chocolate and a card on Valentine’s Day and it was then that I told him I liked him as more than a friend. He had previously been very awkward and shy but he started talking to me more after that and said he would be interested. Things died down a bit and I started to get over him, but I was really confused as to what he wanted since his signals were so mixed! I had a mutual friend ask him what he was planning to do with me. He told the friend that he doesn’t think relationships are worth it in high school because he thinks they will end quickly and he doesn’t have the time, but he really wants to stay friends and keep talking with me and doesn’t want me to think he’s a jerk. I was expecting that, but needless to say, I was still a little disappointed. I know his parents are very strict (he doesn’t have a cell phone or facebook) and make him take hard classes, so I totally understand why he wouldn’t be ready for a relationship. The thing is, I wasn’t looking for a relationship, just a date! But now that I know it’s a lost cause, I’m ready to move on. However, other people found out which is upsetting because I don’t want them to feel bad for me because I don’t feel bad myself. One person flat out said she felt bad for me, and I could sense it in another guy’s tone of voice. They both thought he liked me and felt bad that it wasn’t so. Anyways, the mutual friend told him to talk to me about it, but he never did. He probably still thinks I like him. Should I let it go? Or should I confront him about it? I think I want to talk to him about it because I need closure. We’re in high school.

I think you should let it go. I wish I could go back and let go of all that angst I felt in jr. high/high school trying to date. The chances of you finding the love of your life or even someone that you will really click with in high school are so slim. I wish I could go back and just enjoy being with my friends, being young, having few responsibilities, etc. Instead I was so focused on this guy, that guy, meeting guys, dating guys. Enjoy your youth and start dating in college. Chances are, that’s where you’ll find your soul mate.

Edit: and by the way, you never find the one you’re looking for when you’re looking. Stop looking for love and it will find you.

Technorati Tags: closure, move

I saw a guy on and off for awhile – just a fun thing but somewhere along the way I fell for him. It has been three years and I have since met someone else which I know he isnt happy with and he wont speak to me. I need to resolve my issues and feelings but I dont want to harass him. He told me to get out of his life or he would have me up for stalking. If I go to his place of work – he works alone after all this time could he accuse me of this. It isnt like I am on his doorstep, ringing him up etc. which I thought constituted stalking.

You need to let him be, let him move on with his life. He is trying to deal with losing you, and you have to leave him alone.

Technorati Tags: closure, life, move

basically ive been with my bf a year and he left a week ago without a trace.hes changed his number ,hes literally vanished,i think hes back at his mums ,tho,so ive heard ,but theyr not answering my calls.
ive left emails and texts asking why hes done this,and hes not responding,hes totally blanking me.
obviously ,this looks like he has dumped me asnd my heart is in pieces.
i need closure,i need answers becasue he has rejected me in the most cowardly way.
why do u think he hasnt ended it with meface to face or even by fone or even email or text,just so i can get the answers as to why he has gone?i know other women in this position and they never move on becasue they were left with no explanation.
can i assume its definetly over and why has he chose to ignore me and leave with out a trace or expantion and how do i move on with my heart in tatters not knowing why one minute he was in love with me planning to get engaged and the other minute he disappears with no contact?has anyone any idea why he has done it in this way and what i should do next?i have so many unnanswered questions and i feel demoralised.

Oh my god, what an a**hole, but really he is just a coward, he couldn’t stand to hurt you and feel guilty about it. Although it hurts, he did you a favor and better now than when you are married with kids right? Can you imagine that? The closure will have to come from the fact that you can now confirm that he is not someone you would want to be married to, you saw his true colors. I know this has got to be unbearably difficult. My boyfriend broke up with me (of almost one year) also 5 weeks ago and a week before was talking about marriage and the future. I keep going over and over in my mind and it doesn’t make sense. I will have to keep working day to day on getting over it. Stay strong. Email me if you want.

Technorati Tags: closure, move

I broke up with my boyfriend via text message so I don’t feel I got much closure. Am I using that as an excuse not to move on or is closure really important?

Yes closure is needed. My ex broke up with me over text and we had to talk to get official closure.

Technorati Tags: closure, important, relationship

When it breaks up, the relationship broke.

Why closure is important for some people when they already know the relationship is over? Or, they just want to get their ex back?

You know the saying, when a door closes another opens…yes, closure in your mind does help you to know that there will be another.

Technorati Tags: closure, move

Her girlfriend of a year left her for another . My friend keeps stating the fact that she never got closure… Does anyone know how to get closure without the person beiing there with her?
My friends partner just took her things and was gone. My friend believes for another woman. It’s been a year. There was never closure just up and left. There is no communication whats so ever. Can’t get in touch with her. My friend keeps saying i didn’t get closure. My friend can’t seem to get into another relationship because of this. I hate to see my friend suffer.

Yeah. She has to stop asking herself if it was something SHE did and accept it was something HE did. Once she can do that, she will be able to let go.

Technorati Tags: closure, Dear, friend, move

Absolutely. Without closure, things may seem to disappear for some time, maybe even years, but it will still eat at you mentally. Random thoughts, daydreams, night dreams…they will all bring it to the surface, if only for a short time. Closure is the best option.

Technorati Tags: closure, move, needed

how do i move on when i have no closure. he offered me no explanation… he just stopped talking to me. sent a few emails saying bad things were happening to him — but i know he was talking to other people (just not me). so… it is rejection but i have NO closure. it bothers me a lot… all the time. how can i create closure for myself — i really feel at a loss?? i’ve already tried to contact him too much (i do realize that now) and I’ve stopped. i liked him so much and it was genuine…

Hello..
I Personally Have Been Through Almost The Exact Same Thing..
He Just Stopped Talking To Me All Together..
He Didnt Say Bye Or Anything..
The Only Thing I Can Tell You Is That It Will Take A While But Eventually You Will Find Somebody who Makes You Forget All About Him..
Trust Me..
It May Take Some Time..
But It Will Happen..
Good Luck..
Erika Shea

Technorati Tags: closure, move