Stop the Pain of Break Up NOW Before It's Too Late!

I’m dating this super sensitive guy who’s 8 years older than me (I’m still in college). He’s been hurt really badly before after a 6 year relationship that ended a year ago. He’s very sweet to me, but whenever he talks about his ex he gets teary eyed and it makes me feel like he still has feelings for her. Its been over 6 months that we’ve been seeing each other, and he sends me super mixed signals as to what he wants, and says he’s afraid to get hurt again. He says it’s not about his ex, but he feels like he’s not good enough for me and has to get his life together (moneywise). I told him I dont care about that. He’s introduced me to all his friends, but some nights he wont answer his phone, and others he will, but be very short and distant. When I tried to break up with him out of frustration he begged me not to and that he really cares about me. Which melted my heart because I really care for him too. He says I’m the only girl he’s seeing, but I see no sign of commitment.

He has his ex all over his mind, heart, veins, and who knows where else (hint). It was 6 years. That is a long time, and then all when down the toilet. It is not easy to just forget. And no matter whose fault was the break up, at the end, probably not just him, bit her as well got hurt very bad. So is normal to be afraid, some people are afraid of just dating again cause they could get hurt again.

I’m not sure if he is with you because he wants to forget, or because he really felt in love with you, or for sex… or a combination of everything. And it might be a mystery for you forever, as he might never tell you, or worse; he might don’t even know it himself.

One thing is for sure, he doesn’t want to get hurt again, and he needs someone to be there for him too. And right now, you are that person. If you love him, and care for him as you said, then you have a good chance to help him. As long he is not an asshole (I don’t know that, and probably is too early for you to really know), he will appreciate what you are doing, and if he is honest and serious about how much he claims he cares about you, then you two probably have a good future.

As per my own experience, the key is to be honest with each other. Nobody is Superman, he was hurt and needs help, you can give it to him, so is only up to you to decide what you want to do with the relation. But don’t stay just because you are sorry for him, cause it will sooner or later be worse.

If you decide to be with him, then you two need to sit down, and talk, long honest talk, many times, as many as needed and even more. Make him understand how you feel, and try to understand how he feels. Things might become much better sooner than you think.

And don’t look for commitment yet, he is not ready, that is for sure. First you need to let him see that you are there really for him, and that you will not leave him. It is not easy cause you are pretty much making a commitment while he hasn’t. But that what true love is, to give without asking anything in return.

Good luck.

Technorati Tags: afraid, dating, guy, hurt, lonely, older, sex

She broke up with me fairly recently a little shy of a month ago. She says she wants to be friends but she doesn’t want to completely rule out the possibilty of getting back together just not right now because she is afraid to get hurt again. I on the other hand am having trouble just being friends and wanting more but I want to regain her trust through friendship is this at all possible or even likely? (p.s. I did not cheat on her that is not how I hurt her)

it depends on the nature of the break up. what did you do to cause the break up or was it a mutual thing? i, personally think she has already made up her mind on whether she plans on getting back with you in an intimate way.
keep in mind since she "wants to be friends" means she has rights to explore other options (other guys). the only way to regain her trust is to work on yourself and be the best person you can be. hopefully, she will see the change in you. if not, and you never get her back, at least you improved on yourself for the next girl (and won’t make the same mistakes.)

Technorati Tags: afraid, gf, hurt

I have had two really bad breakups in the past, both long term relationships. I am really afraid of being hurt again. I am with a great guy now who is a better man than either of the other two but I am still afraid. I don’t want to make the same old mistakes, I don’t want to hurt him and I don’t want to fail in another relationship. I know I love him and I want to be with him forever but ho do I get over having been hurt so badly before?

i went through the same thing with one now ex bf, i was with him for a year and the break up was terrible.
im also now with a guy that i truly love.
and at first i was terrified of messing up and and being hurt again.
after awhile i realised that the past relationship will ruin this one if i let the old relationship effect the one i have now
They are two different people, and he helped me realise that.
Just be open with you boyfriend
tell him you love him, but your scared.
he will understand and he can help you through it
it takes two to make a relationship work not just one
i hope this helps
and everything is good
=]

Technorati Tags: afraid, guy, hurt

first off i been getting to know this guy that i really like but i feel i am into him more then he is me.i have been more hurt in relationships then i can count because i hand over my heart to fast and i always end up hurt.
i feel avoided now by him because he is barely speaking to me and when he does he always has an excuse as to why he has to go.i want to get to know him and maybe more but i dont think the feeling is mutual by his actions.i am just afraid that i will get burned again.any advice please? thank you

I know how you feel cuz i told this guy i like him and gave him my number and this is now 5 weeks and he hasent called me and i feel real bad and sad cuz we go to skool together and he doesnt speak to me much anymore…so i know how you feel.

What i usually tell MYSELF is to follow my heart and if i think its for me then go for it but if not let God do the rest.

I gte hurt too much anddont wanna go through that anymore.

Good luck to you and take care!

=]

Technorati Tags: advice, afraid, hurt

work place romance
I’ve fallen for girl from work she felt the same way. we seem to hit it off until just yesterday .i start avoiding her she was so mad at me i felt like an azz hole. the experienced from the past haunted me .I felt romance and business don’t mix together it was heart breaking experience that made me avoid her. am i afraid to get hurt again or just a coward? what’s wrong with me?

Work place romance is not ideal. It’s better if you find someone that you don’t work with.

Technorati Tags: afraid, falling, hurt, Love, workbut

This man and I have been talking for some time now and we are really getting to know each other. We have made it clear we like each other. We have talked about being exclusive in the past week but want to get to know each other better. I feel like not talking to him in fear of him rejecting me. When we are together I feel like he adores me because of the way he looks at me and treats me. How do I prevent myself from being hurt and how do I know he is sincere?

What you guys fear is what you are going to attract.

SERIOUSLY….so if it feels right don’t question it.
Don’t make this person walk into a relationship and make them carry the baggage of the past.

Take a deep breath and take a chance.

Technorati Tags: afraid, fall, hurt, Love